Back in the Saddle..

2-27-09-M- She's baaaaaaaaackkkkkkkkkkk.. Finally a week where I don't feel like I have to make excuses for not dropping the pounds!!! Rick better watch what he says because this week I dropped over 5lbs. That's right .. I'm making better food choices.. and tracking when I'm most hungry which tends to be later in the day. So I'm not eating as much mid-day and then making salads and fruit or soup to fill up and then a sensible meal! Not to mention all the white tea with blueberry I've been drinking..!!! As for the bet.. my Tattoo will say Rick can kiss this NOT so FAT ASS!!!

Once Again its On Like Donkey Kong

There she goes, talkin about that ass again! Beat me ... Bahhhh. In June Im going to go up there and SMACK that ass and say; 'Didnt quite lose enough of this, did ya.' Then I'll just have to charge my ink to your account and it will say Mo'Bigger Ass Lost! But thats okay, you gotta strive for those unreachable dreams M! Looks like I am starting to work my way down again. Was 248.2 today so perhaps Im starting to stumble back on track a little bit. Yes, I know I weighed, and she predicted that I would and she knows me so I figured I would give up that one.

Yes, she is right about me not so much doing this to lose the weight. Im on board beacause I know she wants to lose it bad and whats the best way I can support her? By poking her competitve side and sharing it all with her! Besides there are some rewards at the end of this I just will NOT miss! ;-)

Pizza is 15 Points!

Thank Gawd.. I had nothing for breakfast.. the call of Fat Tuesday has been there.. so I had a slice of pizza.. egads.. out of 25 points for the day . Sweet mother of pearl I'll be having salad and water for dinner. Rick is full of crap.. he'll end up beating me.. that turns him on .. I just know it does. This bet isn't about .. weight loss for him.. it's about beating me. Pain in the ass that he is.. he say's he won't lose the weight or get on the scale but I know him. He's sneaky.. he's just waiting to pounce. But that doesn't matter because I'm gonna beat him fair and square and then he'll be paying for my tattoo.. that will Read.. Rick can Kiss MY ass!

The Journey Offers Twists and Turns

Well, its funny how the journey works sometimes! M has her set backs and doesnt lose nearly as much ground as she thought she would and I am not only eating less and doing a 2 week cleansing, but I manage to gain back 6lbs and lose weeks worth of ground for no particular reason. Its almost March too. I think Im going to just quit the weighing until the summer, concede this thing and go pay up in June. So, 249.5 lbs for me now and weeks of worthless work wooooo. Just gotta love it.

Brutal Honesty!

2-22-09- M.. Ok.. I got back on the scale.. if misery loves company so does flab. I am now heavier than I was when we started this. Which means I have to lose that plus the weight we bet each other we'd lose. But getting back on the scale was a start. I also rejoined weight watchers online and hope to keep better tabs on myself. I bought a new scale since I have zero time to keep starting up the wii fit for each weigh in. I bought a Brita Water Filter Pitcher to save money on all the water I'm going to have to consume if I have any hopes of catching Rick.
The thing is even with the setbacks.. I'm still here and still engaged in doing this.. which at this point in the game I didn't think I would be. The past month has been rough.. I won't deny that but I'm starting to feel like my old self again.. coming out of mourning my period over my old relationship and really starting to embrace my life the adventure not my life the person who got dumped or my life the person who gained weight. But me.. the super dork.. the silly mom.. the best friend to Rick.. Me.. the person I have to get to know again and to love myself more than I love a container of ice cream.. it will never love me back.

Still in a Funk

2-18-09 M-Even with my best efforts I"m still a mess.. the breakup is taking it's toll and I've been eating my way through everything. My one true saving grace has been Ricks wonderful kindness and support. While I applaud him and am happy for him I"m a little pissy he's frankly kicking my ass! I keep hoping something will jar me out of this funk and get me moving again. Each morning I wake up and think today's the day. I'm gonna really do this . Then fall back into my old pattern of having a healthy breakfast.. a decent lunch then snack.. snack snack. Ugh..

1 Wonderful Party

You know when M checks out of that horrible hotel and she gets herself back ... she will start to come back to life. I look forward to that so much as I miss the real M! So, as she starts eating to nourish and stops doing it to fill a void, it will all fall together!

My 245.2 lbs on the scale this morning is a pleasure to see and a full 8lbs gone since this quest began. But I must not let it up I am up against a wily diet pro that when on her game is a disciplined healthy eating machine. My small current advantage will be goine before I know it if I am not careful! 200lbs is a LONG way away. Cant seem to choose what I win yet, but I am working on it! It must be a bonding, meaningful thing. Something special to look back on. That is in case of the long odds that are on me ... come in. I think the treadmill may be calling me again.

Heartbreak Hotel .. Party of 1

2-7-09- M- Well I've been very naughty for the past month the good intentions were there and then they faded as the depression and winter blues took over. When I said it wasn't what I was eating but what was eating me it was very true. I've been waiting for the other shoe to drop with my boyfriend for a long time now and it finally has. Neither of us has been happy for a very long time. I hung on and hung on but there is no more hanging on . I'm flying without a net here. The pain is unreal but it's also coupled with a big sigh of relief. It's now time for me to see what I can do on my own. One of the biggest things about my relationship with my boyfriend was he was a food enabler. He weighed in at a healthy 300lbs and had a healthy self esteem to match. It was up to me to decide what I put in my mouth but it was also harder to do when faced with a constant array of mouthwatering meals and succulent treats. Now it's up to me to decide what path I can choose. Do I wallow in self pity and get fatter or do I reclaim my spirit and move forward. It's easy to say I'd pick the path of greater good.. but anyone that's been through a heartbreak knows that's not always easy . I pray for the strength to love myself enough to not slip into even worse habits or create new ones. Thank you to Rick.. he's been through this all with me and he's just a wonderful human being and a great friend. Time to go rip up some pictures and letters. For gawds sake.. I've been dumped right before Valentines Day.. Oh the humanity!

Maintaining is the watch word

M knows what she is talking about when she mentions the winter blues. I cycle through them routinely it seems, especially when I am paying attention to see them. But, Im trying to keep progress in mind, as in more steps forward than back and in that I seem to be doing okay. I have managed to stay under the 250 milestone even with the bad eating habits at times. The 248.2lbs I saw on the scale today is at least 5 full lbs off my weight when we started this odyssey. I still need to do better but its a start. June is coming quick! Still working on a bet reward for when I win! IT needs to be a good one.